Kid: PK is in! I have read the intro "Here..." and the draft of HELLHOUND. Lo and behold, DIESEL DEVELOPMENT in its two parts is here from your reading edification. Blog on, mister. Further American lore: "It's my party" and I'll blog if I wanna.

Diesel Development#1B

We have recently seen the emergence of scads of shaven headed males on television and on the red carpets of Hollywood; lest we ignore the distaff side, do the names Britney Spears and Sinead O'Connor ring a bell ? Where did this about face really come from? Certainly not from the military boot camps or from Yul Brynner, the famed King of Siam. Yul gave it a valiant try, but he was a bit before his time and could not shake the cue ball sneers. Was it Mr. Clean? No, he was a joke...er, cartoon. Was it Kojak? Definitely not. None of the contemporary shavelings would be caught dead in constant use of a lollipop fashion accessory. Was it Howie Mandel? Who? You know, the white man's anemic answer to Oprah. Most assuredly not Mr.Mandel who is not an anthropological innovator but a mere camp follower. Who then has set thousands of years of hair idolatry on its collective backside ? None other than Vin Diesel actor, writer, director, producer, body builder, and proud owner of an award winning skull which may have had no more hair than a five-o'clock shadow since its emergence from the birth canal. Refer to Mr. Diesel in his cranial break-out movie Pitch Black in which the play of light and shadow off of his sleek skull is in the finest tradition of the German impressionists. This is the Olympian who has broken the bonds of our Neanderthal past and taught males everywhere to hold their heads high and shave that skull. Now if he can only get those well-oiled male models on board... VIN TRIUMPHANT

Diesel Development#1A

The Neanderthals are coming. Yes, these venerable, but hardly cuddly, distant humanoid cousins of us humans are making a comeback eventhough they previously lost the developmental race to our closer relatives the Cro-Magnon bunch. You will recall the Neanderthal crowd began a Euro tour over 40 thousand years ago, but, alas, began losing population about 30 thousand years ago only to have disappeared about 20 thousand years ago when Cro-Magnon man was well established. Neanderthal would not have made it in Hollywood. They were a beastly lot with protruding brows, hugh jaws, thick ape-like bodies, a bestial gait, and horrors! bad teeth. But the one attribute which endeared them to modern man was their hair. It was a bit unruly for lack of styling gel, but was thick and everywhere. It seems this supreme hirsutness was a protection against the Euro winters. Afterall, Ned didn't have central heating, Pendleton coats, wool blankets, or polyester layering systems. They may not have had fire for a while. But they did have hair. This hairy factor may explain the sudden appearance of late of a Neanderthal actor in commercials and even a sit-com. Was there an Actor's Studio in Europe 35 thousand years ago? Yes, Ned has insinuated himself into the wonderful world of television, hair, bad teeth , brows and all. Why you ask? Come,come, history provides the clues. When Homo Sapiens evolved along the Cro-Magnon path, we inherited the Cro-Magnon deep- seated sense of superiority to Ned in all things except for the hair. The Cro-Magnon deeply admired, desired, yes, lusted after the thick, wooly thicket of Neanderthal hair. As we, the descendants of Cro-Magnon, have done for centuries. Witness the penchant of Middle Ages Europeans for long flowing locks; wigs, periukes ruled society in Europe in the 15th through 18th centuries. English jurists, judges and barristers alike wear wigs to this day. Artificial hair in the form of toupees, i.e rugs, some claiming the miracle of swimability without floating away have been with us for centuries. Glue on hair, hair needle-punched into the scalp, Hair Club for Men (why not Neanderthal Club for men?) just keep seeking that hairy Nirvana. We also have the comb-over nation which emulates Ned with a paucity of follicles. These do-it-your-selfers risk having the comb-over become a flap hanging down one side of the head exposing a shining pate when outside in a wind. Oh,the invective hurled at the non-hirsute: baldy, chrome dome, cue ball. The French not kindly labeled one of their kings Charles the Bald. And while all this has developed Homo Sapiens, over time began to lose not only cranial hair, but body hair as well. Chest hair is becoming sparser and rarer, back hair in men has dissapeared except in those few who are referred to as "apes", leg hair and arm hair has become thinner. What does our enlightened society do to face this attack on hair? The reader may wish to rent the musical HAIR at this point to see the pinnacle of the hairy revolution. What have the movers and shakers done? Advertising has removed all hair from male models except carefully coiffed and colored head displays. These guys are so hairless they couldn't get a date with a blind Neanderthal babe. CONTINUED